How Radical Responsibility Changes Everything

Few things strip our power as much as blaming and complaining.

When we feel angry at someone or a situation, we often need to vent those emotions. That venting comes off as blame and complaint.

After we vent, we feel so much better.

But guess what? Nothing has changed.

We have only spoken words. We have not done anything to address the problem.

And so, the problem returns, we get fired up, and we vent again.

Rinse and repeat.

This cycle only ends in one place: disappointment.

When we complain, we give agency to no one.

When we take responsibility, we give agency to ourselves.

In today’s article, I am going to teach you how taking radical responsibility changes everything.

No longer will you look at challenges and think, “That’s not fair.”

That is for complainers.

Below, you will learn to have the attitude, “Bring it on” and see how your life changes.

What is radical responsibility?

Radical responsibility is when you take complete ownership and accountability for your actions, decisions, and results in life.

Are you out of shape? Your fault.

Are you tired because you couldn’t sleep last night? Your fault.

Did you have a bad day? Your fault.

Did you get a flat tire? Yup… your fault.

But what about things that you cannot be responsible for?

If a meteorite strikes your house, or if lightning causes a fire nearby… your fault? In a way, yes. Your reactions to these are your fault. Your preparations for these are your fault.

And what about other people’s attitudes and reactions? You may not be able to control them, but you can (and should) control your own.

But why on earth should we strive for radical responsibility?

It is all about empowerment.

Why Radical Responsibility?

Responsibility is empowering.

When you take responsibility for your thoughts, feelings, and actions, you give yourself the power to change. Because of this. you can become more resilient, self-aware, empathetic, positive, performant, and motivated.

You cannot change what you do not control. If you try, you will be met with frustration.

But you can change yourself. There is a future version of yourself waiting to be created. You can only create that version of yourself if you take responsibility.

Let’s look at 3 high impact areas where radical responsibility changes your life:

• Health
• Mindset
• Presence

While there are many more, these 3 will paint the picture and give us a starting point.

Own your Health

Are you fit and healthy?

Are you out of shape?

Let’s assume that you could be in better shape (as most everyone I talk to wishes they were in better shape, no matter their current condition).

Whose fault is it for not being in shape? Yes… it is yours. It has to be.

No one is forcing you to eat poorly.

No one is forcing you to NOT exercise.

These are simply decisions… and there is power in the choice here. If you choose to not exercise, but continue to blame your busy schedule, you are avoiding responsibility. Instead, own it.

If you don’t exercise, admit that you are choosing not to. Admit that there is something else you would rather be doing.

It’s OK. There is no judgment attached to this. You are not a bad person for not exercising.

When you don’t exercise, you might have more time to work on that side hustle, read a book, play that video game you love, etc.

Just own it.

The same goes for your diet. You choose to eat everything that goes in your mouth.

Just own it without judgment.

Once you own it without judgment, you give yourself the space and opportunity to reflect on your choices.

Can you make a different choice? What will you lose if you choose to exercise (you might lose some gaming time, or scrolling time)? What will you gain if you make a different choice?

When you acknowledge your choice without judgment, you give yourself full control over those choices. There is no one else but you.

Health might be the obvious example to pick on first. Let’s look at another that flies under the radar.

Own your Mindset

What stories do you tell yourself?

What do you believe to be true?

Who do you believe yourself to be?

These might actually be difficult questions to answer. If you simmer on them, you will see you have opinions and beliefs that permeate your thoughts.

If you are introverted, you might think, “I’m not good at public speaking.” If you are a data-oriented human, you might think, “I don’t have good people skills.” If you are an extrovert, you might think, “I’m not the creative type.”

That is all BS.

You are what you think you are… and are not.

Our core beliefs, self-image, and mindset are all unseen navigators of our lives. They influence what we do, avoid, excel at, and fail at.

Luckily, these stories and beliefs are ours to own. Take responsibility for your story.

What is the story you tell yourself? Who do you think you are? Guess what… you can become a different person by simply thinking and believing you are a different person.

For example, if you believe you are impatient, you can turn this behavior around by reminding yourself that you are patient. It really is that simple. Imagine if you reminded yourself every morning, “I am a patient person.” It would take little time before you changed your behavior to match this new mantra.

As I have written about in the past, remember that there are two voices in your mind: the inner critic and the inner advocate. Both are available to you. The one you listen to most is the one that guides your behavior. If you listen to your inner critic, own it and choose to listen to the inner advocate.

Then, choose how you show up.

Own your Presence

How are you showing up to your meetings, conversations, and tasks? What presence do you bring? Are you memorable, or do you blend in with the background? Do you ignore people, or do you make them feel understood?

Your presence is the thing that other people recognize when they see you. It is the air about you, the way you make them feel without saying anything.

Own your presence.

Do NOT just show up without intention. How many times do you rush into a meeting to start listening and waiting to respond?

Instead, set an intention for your next meeting.

It can be something like, “I am going to listen to everyone, assimilate their feedback, and suggest a course of action. I will make others feel important.”

By setting an intention, you prime your brain to take the actions you want to take. You don’t leave it up to chance.

When you fully own your presence, you can empathize, inspire, influence, and connect with others.

If you show up haphazardly, you might fall back on old stories and disregard your presence.

Show up like you mean to be there. Show up like you are there with a purpose. Becuase you do.

When you take radical responsibility, you quikly realize that no one else is going to show up and do your work for you.

You are the one.

You can impact others.

But you must choose your presence.

What Next?

The idea of radical responsibility is not new. Even so, if should be brought up every so often to remind us of our power.

Our power is only available when we seize it with responsibility. A challenge is an opportunity for us to grow. A conflict is an opportunity to build a relationship. A pile of donuts is an opportunity for exercising self-control.

the cavalry is not coming. No one is coming to save you.

But that’s ok. Because you are badass. And you take responsibility.

I’m rooting for you!

Clark