Grit has an Older Sibling: Mental Toughness

Grit is your ability to persevere.

Grit is “big picture” perseverance that helps us pick ourselves up, step into challenging situations, and grow over time.

If you want to learn more, I wrote about grit last week and shared three strategies to develop it.

But before grit was all the rage, its sibling was at the forefront of the research: mental toughness.

Mental toughness is the acute version of grit.

Grit won’t help you navigate emotional situations. Mental toughness will.

Grit won’t help you step up under pressure. Mental toughness will.

Grit will help you succeed in the long term.

Mental toughness will help you succeed right now.

In this article I am going to teach you how to build mental toughness.

You can focus on your passion and purpose to develop grit.

But if you don’t develop mental toughness, you won’t make it past the difficult situations that push you to grow.

By learning mental toughness, you will be able to steep in discomfort.

This will contribute to grit and help push you to new heights.

Let’s get learning.

Mental Toughness

Mental toughness refers to the ability to thrive in challenging situations, often characterized by adversity and pressure.

It involves remaining resilient and adaptable in the face of stress, uncertainty, and difficulties.

Mental toughness emphasizes managing emotions and maintaining focus and composure during high-pressure situations.

It involves staying calm and making rational decisions under stress.

In a nutshell, can you stay in control and take action during a stressful situation?

To develop mental toughness, there are three tactics you can leverage:

• The 2-second rule
• Emotional detachment
• The power of one more

Let’s start by talking about the conversations you have with yourself.

The 2-Second Rule

Have you ever argued with yourself?

Maybe you need to get out of bed, but you don’t want to.

Maybe you need to work out, but you have other things you could do.

Maybe you should NOT eat that donut, but it looks so good.

When you engage in debates with yourself, one side always loses.

Also, the more time you spend arguing with yourself, the more you whip your emotions into a frenzy and you are more likely to make the wrong decision.

The solution is the 2-second rule.

When you have the thought to do something, or not to do something, you have 2 seconds to step toward your ideal outcome.

Do you need to work out? Go get your shoes on.

Want to avoid that donut? Step away and grab a water.

Need to have that tough conversation? Start talking.

When you follow the 2-second rule, you stop arguing with yourself.

Self-argument only builds tension and competing motivations. You start to justify why something is good or not good and your emotional brain gets involved.

Stop it.

Make a decision in 2 seconds.

This also applies to work you are doing in the moment. When you hear that whiny voice in your head telling you to stop because things are hard, it is time to implement #2.

Emotional Detachment

Our brains protect us. They are wired to seek things good for our survival and avoid things that are dangerous.

When we see something dangerous, we feel fear or anxiety.

When we see something opportunistic, we feel the positive emotions of anticipation and excitement.

These feelings can trick you.

You might feel positive emotions when confronted with unhealthy food.

You might feel negative emotions when thinking about making time to exercise.

These are clear opposites of what the “right” answer is.

This is where emotional detachment comes in.

Our emotional reactions are natural and typically occur before we have rational thoughts.

This is why emotional reactions can be ineffective. They are often irrational and are commonly rooted in fear or excitement, which we know we cannot always trust.

When you feel reactive, pause. Don’t react.

Don’t immediately go for the donut.

Don’t quit.

Just pause.

Assess the “positive” or “negative” quality of your current situation.

As you identify the quality, remove the polarization and get to neutral thinking.

There is no good or bad. There is only what is required.

What do you need to do to achieve your goals?

What conversation do you need to have?

What is clear about the challenge you are facing?

You may feel hope or fear just thinking about these. Maintain your neutrality.

When you look at things neutrally, you prevent your negative reactions from influencing your perceptions.

As you are stuck in the middle of a hard situation and you want to quit, think neutrally.

And carry on for at least a bit longer. Just do one more.

The Power of One More

There is power in one more.

One more step.

One more rep.

One more minute.

Ed Mylett writes about this principle in his book, The Power of One More. He tells a story of his father who was a recovering alcoholic. When asked if he will stay sober for the rest of his life, his father replies, “I don’t know, but I can tell you this: I’m gonna stay sober for one more day.”

One more day adds up to forever.

When you are struggling through a challenge, can you do one more?

In the gym, when you are tired and your muscles hurt, do one more rep. One more set.

When you are on a run and want to quit, do one more mile.

When you are in the office and you want to react to a coworker, take one more minute to respond.

“One more” gives us more time outside of our comfort zone. Given all improvement occurs outside the comfort zone, we create space and time for greater adaptation.

While physical discomfort will occur during workouts, mental discomfort will come whenever you are pushed out of your comfort zone (physically or mentally).

Acknowledge that discomfort is actually just the pain of adaptation.

Just do one more.

The Wrap Up

Mental toughness is a part of grit. If you want to persevere over the long run, you must push through difficulty in the short term.

To demonstrate and build mental toughness, stop arguing with yourself, get to neutral thinking, and do one more.

Over time you will build acute and chronic resilience necessary to level up your performance.

Keep crushing it!

Clark